“I saw a broken man struggling to stand up whole as his soul was seeking to shackle him down to the shame of his sins; his lips began to part parting proofs precisely word by word telling me with his eyes closed shut, seeking out the Divine within every gem that dripped from his lips that ‘Bismillaahir Rahmaanir Raheem, Qul huwal laahu ahad, Allah hus-samad, Lam yalid wa lam yoolad, Wa lam yakul-lahu kufuwan ahad’ was indeed the sound proof. And I began to ponder, crack up my heart and told him to keep firm for what he just said was all he ever needed. His eyes dropped bombs internally, dripping, bleeding, eyes overflowing with tears, a man in his twenties fighting, dancing upon egg shells, trying to stand upright as his sins kept him withdrawing from al-siratul mustaqeem. He exposed a heart in mourning for his tomorrows, struggling to mend his yesterdays and todays for a life of tomorrow that will lend his whole spirit to the Most Divine. His voice quaked and the streets began to talk to me. His eyes met mines shooting me countless times with truth. I jumped into his eyes, raced within his insides and found myself looking out to see myself looking back in. We were standing on the same side of the counter, trying to seek His mercy for we were sinners just trying to get right. Hoping to have our book of deeds handed to us in our right-hands. Our hands were left empty of nothing but our lives to give. Our hearts to offer up as sacrifice for this was all he had…this was all I had. This was all we had. I never thought this stranger that stood in front of me would unfold and write out my eulogy for I was dying. For I was dying a death that would shed my former-self. I wondered how it would be on that Day because at that moment he was standing bare in front of me. Unraveling/unveiling the secrets that lies within our lives. We are sometimes running/walking/racing/passing our lives away finding ourselves carrying countless things weighing us down to find ourselves being POW’s, prisoners of war because we’ve been caputred too many times by ourselves seeking guidance in wrong things and people. I saw him beating/knocking/setting flame to the door of His Lord, for he was seeking nothing, no one but the Divine. He was an unfolding book outlining the ruthlessness of the meaningless world that weaves its way in our lives, seeking to only search and destroy our hearts. Every word that flowed from his lips became like scripture, making my soul rush to forgiveness, for he and I both knew that this battle between life and death was real. And we sat upon the edge of our souls and jumped to our annihilation in order to seek He above the heavens for our hearts were yearning for better tomorrows. I closed my eyes to see with clear vision that this stranger was a messenger from the Most Divine for he had just searched the deep-depths of my soul and ripped out the disease that lied deep within, placing upon it its black shroud to deliver it back to it’s hell for I was done. I was witnessing Divine intervention at play and this strange man was showing me hidden treasures. Ripping me apart word-by-word, telling me ‘Bismi Allahi alrrahmanialrraheemi, Inna aAAtaynaka alkawthara, Fasalli lirabbika wainhar, Inna shani-aka huwa al-abtaru” and that the battle to survive is very much real. And that our lives are only for He that gives and take life. And that this life is our sacrifice. For this world will try to snatch away our hearts/this deen for that which is devilish and hellish…” -Excerpt from “The Subway Man Recited Scriptures from His Sinful Lips”
This morning I found myself hungry for a sandwich from Subway, so I went to get one. One of the local Subways that I sometimes visit is really interesting. Many of the employees enjoy asking me questions about Islam or telling me how they are amazed at the traffic-jam that surrounds a local-mosque on Fridays. However, one of the employees is Muslim and would always recite to me Qur’anic texts. He always tell me that he has another surah(chapter) of the Qur’an to recite to me in Arabic, so I would listen as he would make my sandwich. As he recited, I would always follow him in the chapters he recited…if I knew them. However, today was different. He recited his surahs and he gave me real-talk about life. It’s always times like this that makes me think and reflect about humanity. We are all trying to make sense out of the world around us. And as Muslims, we are always trying to evaluate ourselves spiritually. In listening to the words that he had told me this morning, I found inspiration to just get together a collection of poetry that deals with the issues that we were talking about. There’s always this fight against our souls and to fight to gain the pleasure of the Divine. It was really ironic because he was telling me about his struggle to stay afloat in Islam while trying to deal with the struggles of worldly life. In talking about his struggles, he was indeed helping me with my own personal struggles. So, I wanted to write about that experience by the passage that I quoted above.
The truth is that you’ll never know what you’ll find in the world and when you find yourself stumbling upon truth then never let it go. Also, it’s important to never restrict yourself in where you think truth should or could come from. You can find truth in the most unexpected places. This strange man that I would see once or twice a month came as a form of Divine intervention. That may sound strange to some people, but it’s the truth. We can truly reflect each other and when this happens…it’s scary but sometimes necessary.
And at the end of the day, we should not be caught up in trying to quickly judge someone off of appearances because appearances can be deceiving. Just simply listen to someone’s words and let it penetrate, if possible. You’ll never know where you’ll get a wake-up call, but when you get it…wake up.
Assalamu alaykom (Peace Be Upon You),
Over the last week I have found myself going skating on a daily-basis to let off some steam, but it wasn’t until I pulled out my prayer-rug and read Qur’an that I found true contentment. It was a different kind of contentment. It’s a kind of contentment that is reassuring. I’ve thought about the Eid and how I may have to pass on attending the Eid-prayer on Tuesday, inshALLAH due to a science-lab that I have on the morning of the Eid. I’ve never missed an Eid’s prayer since I’ve been Muslim, but I guess this time will be an exception. It kills me, but it’s just a choice I may have to make, inshALLAH. I absolutely love celebrating the Eid (the day of happiness/festivity) with others. I usually get a new outfit, go out to attend the morning-prayer, and do things afterwards in celebration of the day. InshALLAH, I will still celebrate the Eid, but I may just miss the prayer- which is the best part for me. It’s so moving and exciting. I absolutely love it. It’s a beautiful beginning for the start of an Eid. So, I’m not sure what I’m going to do. Allah knows best! I will pray about this.
However, I read Surah Hajj and Surah Muminoon over the last two hours and found myself just startled. Why startled? I don’t know. Just reading Qur’an just makes you slow down and think about the bigger picture. We are all going through our own issues and problems and Qur’an reminds us that life on Earth isn’t a paradise. We are here to strive and worship. However, don’t get it twisted and think we have to be angels because we aren’t. We are human-beings dealing with the trials and tribulations of life.
“To Him (God/Allah) belongs what is in the heavens and what is on the earth. And indeed, Allah is the Free of need, the Praiseworthy” -22:64
I’m not perfect and will never claim to be, but I am very much an individual that seeks to live a life in a way that offers meaning. There’s this reality that while we enjoy the life of this world there is the life of the hereafter. In Islam, there aren’t saints. There aren’t monasteries or convents. So, there is no such thing as withdrawing from the world because a Muslim should be able to balance the world and their spiritual-life. And this is a trial for many because some have taken much of this world as their final resting place when it’s not. In between living life, there are the five-daily prayers. In between having a good time, there are obligations we must give to others. Our spouses have rights over us. Our neighbors have rights over us. Our children have rights over us. Our parents have rights over us. Our pets have rights over us. Our Lord have rights over us. We have to always strike that balance, so right now…I’m trying to strike that balance.
Sometimes I find myself dipping my hands in too many things at once. In doing this, I cause myself to get burnt out and to just withdraw from people. Many times when I get overtly stressed out, I just write, skate or just listen to something. It’s my therapy. In many ways, this is my reason for blogging. It’s a form of therapy. It’s a form of self-expression. Not only is it self-expression, but it’s something that I enjoy. And sometimes, I just like to be by myself. I like to sit out in nature and just watch the world around me. I do many things, but I also isolate myself too. I like to seek that balance between my social and personal-life. It’s quite important for me to reflect on my personal-life. I believe I am like this because of Islam. Islam really humanizes me. It makes me look at the world as a whole. Also, it causes me to look at my own life and the relationships that I have with others. It strips me of everything and causes me to think critically about myself. And this is what I need. This is what we all need. We just need to sometimes be real with ourselves and not lie about the reality of our lives and how we live them.
Just some Saturday night’s thoughts.
In many ways, I tend to read alot of different things. I really try to refrain from restricting myself. Yes, there are some things in which I will never read. However, I found myself getting into science-fiction after being told to read Olivia Butlers’ Lilith’s Brood (formerly the Xenogenesis trilogy). I didn’t read it all, but the parts that I did read was fascinating to me. I found the different issues surrounding: sexuality, race, post-human, the ‘other’, and the apocalypse as being eye-opening and insightful for many reasons. It was after being told to read this science-fiction literary work that I was opened to this particular genre. Now, I will not say that I read science-fiction on a daily-basis or even on a weekly-basis, but I am open to it. However, in my quest of reading whatever is placed within my lap I have found myself really learning alot about various things. I believe your mind is opened up to different perspectives and realities. So, this need or importance in reading books is really that- a need. Yes, some people will say “stay clear of reading too many of them books,” but I laugh at such a comment. I believe if people actually picked up a book, read the content and analyzed what they were reading than they would probably feel the same as me.
However, if someone prefers to stick to just religious-texts than that’s quite fine too. I think religious-texts serves the same function(s) as other books. Religious-texts serves to look at different stories most times to give individuals different realities and perspectives to learn from and analyze. If we were to look at the Qur’an, we would see how God places stories of those that came before as a means in teaching the people of now about their errors, their obstacles, their accomplishments and their trials. It serves as a foundation for you in guiding you in how to think and how to live. Also, it can function as being a means into helping you in sorting through the problems and encounters that you have in your personal-life. And stories tend to relate more to people and allows for individuals to feel connected on a very interpersonal level. However, religious-texts are sacred and holds a sacred function that secular-texts will not serve.
So, I believe books serve various functions no matter if they are sacred or secular. In many ways, books can humanize us. It allows us to jump within the lives of others and it allows us to see the vices of life.These aren’t the only reasons why books are important, but they can be the foundation of why we may begin reading.
One of the issues that I constantly have to sort-through personally is the issue of identity and acceptance. In many social-circles within different Muslim-communities, people choose to stigmatize converts for various reasons…many of which are ridiculous. These stigmas are very much hurtful and even damaging for the psyche of the convert. I’ve been Muslim for the last six years and I still continue to get the same question about me changing my name. I’ve always been of the opinion that my name doesn’t classify me as being pious or impious. I am my actions and words. It is known in the Islamic-tradition that faith is seen through the acts that you perform with your limbs. So, I continue to believe this. Many people fail to realize that the prophet’s (peace be upon him) companions were indeed converts and their names were Arabic and they were in Arabia, so their names matched the place they lived. Their names were specific to their geographical location. Yes, this may not be the case for everyone but it was definitely their case. So, why do people still ask why I have yet to change my name? Many individuals through the Muslim-community have even went so far to say that I am imitating the kuffar by not changing my name to a Muslim-one. I’ve even had someone tell me that I should name my child an Arabic name when I have one to differerientate him/her from Western society. I’m sorry, but I am a Western Muslim and I do not feel the least amount of guilt for being so. So, let me stop right there. Whenever someone tell me to change my name I simply ask them if they mean I should change my name to an Arabic one. Why do so many equate being Muslim with being Arabic and looking a certain way?
However, I would say that we have to stop stigmatizing people for wanting to keep their identity, especially when it doesn’t pose any problem to Islam. The only time the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) would change the name of a companion is if it meant something bad. And I’m not trying to do extensive research about my name. It’s not that serious. If only we could move beyond superficiality. What is a name, anyways? Just something that you call yourself and identity yourself by for identification purposes. Why not look at me from my actions instead? Telling a convert that they should or is encouraged to change their name is troubling to me. It’s troubling because it shows this incessant obsession with outwardly appearances. In the Islamic-tradition, Allah doesn’t look at our bodies or our clothing but our hearts. So, what does that mean? It means exactly what it says. Allah looks at our actions and what is within our hearts. So, why do we seek to box people up into categories?
In many ways, it is us that strip people of themselves. It’s not Islam. Islam is quite clear in how it deals with personal-identities. Islam never forbids an individual to stop being Bengali, Sengalese, Black, White, Spanish, Chinese, Indian, or etc. So, why do we seek to bid identity? The prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was an Arab man, so he had his own culture. Sometimes people will get culture confused with Islam and will seek to correct you about something that isn’t even Islamic. Some people will tell you that we have to eat with our fingers, but this is incorrect. We can if we would like, but it’s not an obligation. Or if you’re a sister you have to wear a black abaya with a black hijab. Correction, if this is what you’re wanting to do than go forth in wearing it. I typically wear my abayas on a daily-basis, but I may switch it up. The abaya is Arabic and it doesn’t have to be the daily-attire of a Muslim woman. So, where is all of this coming from? Why must we infringe upon someone else’s culture to impose another? We have to respect the diversity that we have within the Muslim-community. If someone doesn’t speak Arabic, look Arabic or have an Arabic name than you should quickly get over it. If someone doesn’t appear as Muslim as you like than you should quickly get over it. It’s you that is wrong for stripping people of their identity. It is you that creates hostility and division. It is you that is seeking to maintain racist ideologies from the days of Jahiliya (pre-Islam/ignorance).
An American-Muslim is simply American. What does it mean to be American? It means that this Muslim is coming from a society that is specific in certain traditions, cultural-norms, ways of viewing and living life. This is no different than the person coming from Japan, Spain, Senegal, Ghana, Afghanistan or Saudi Arabia. We are all from different places, but we unite under Islam. We should embrace the diversity that Islam gives us. We shouldn’t take it for granted. Instead of trying to measure someone’s Muslimness….how about trying to understand how we can come together to better ourselves and our communities through practicing Islam? Why does that seem like a better option than the option of simply judging someone based-off of superficiality? I am not pointing fingers at anyone specific, but this is just a needed wake-up call for those that seem to feel troubled to see or know of a Muslim that doesn’t necessarily look or sound like them. In case you’re seeking daleel or evidence for why I am opposed to racism, please continue to read:
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “If anyone travels on a road in search of knowledge, God will cause him to travel on one of the roads of Paradise. The angels will lower their wings in their great pleasure with one who seeks knowledge. The inhabitants of the heavens and the Earth and (even) the fish in the deep waters will ask forgiveness for the learned man. The superiority of the learned over the devout is like that of the moon, on the night when it is full, over the rest of the stars. The learned are the heirs of the Prophets, and the Prophets leave (no monetary inheritance), they leave only knowledge, and he who takes it takes an abundant portion. – Sunan of Abu-Dawood, Hadith 1631
The prophet Muhamamd (peace be upon him) is telling us that even God(Allah) understands the fish in the sea, so what does that tell us? This tells us that language comes from Allah and that if Allah understands the fish in the sea than the diversity of languages that we see in our world is from Allah. On top of that, no person should feel sad that they don’t speak Arabic or another language. Allah gave us the language(s) that we have, so feel at ease. Easy, easy does it!
If this hadith isn’t sufficient for you in regards to why we shouldn’t feel the need to be racist and ethnocentric than please continue reading:
O mankind, indeed We have created you from male and female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another. Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you. Indeed, Allah is Knowing and Acquainted. (49:13)
This is indeed the ultimate proof for how we have to move away from these racist and ethnocentric ways in which we carry with us to: mosques, events, gatherings, and parties. So, please just leave people alone. We have to realize that enjoining the good and forbidding the evil should only be done by an individual that has knowledge of that which is halal (good) and haraam (good) or else we may speak things that are false and untrue.
“Ibn ul Qayyim said that it is the greatest sin. Ibn ul Qayyim said that speaking about Allaah swt without `ilm is the greatest sin that you could commit. He bases it on this verse”:
“Qul innamaa 7arrama Rabbi-l-fawaa7isha maa DHahara minhaa wa maa baTan, wal-ithma wal-baghya bi ghayri-l-7aqq, wa an tushrikoo bi-Llaahi maa lam yunazzil bihi sulTaanaa, wa an taqoolo 3ala-l-Laahi maa laa ta3lamoon.”
“Say: The things that my Lord has indeed forbidden are al-Fawaahishah (great evil sins, every kind of unlawful sexual intercourse, etc.), whether committed openly or secretly, sins (of all kinds), unrighteous oppession, joining partners (in worship) with Allaah for which He has given no authority and saying things about Allaah of which you have no knowledge.” [The Noble Qur’aan, 7:33]
So, we just have to be careful in how we choose to direct our concerns. If we are speaking without knowledge then this is extremely serious and should be cautioned against to the best of our abilities. So, remember the next time you feel compelled to tell someone that this or that is haraam (bad/unlawful). So, remember this the next time you choose to tell someone their name is haraam (bad/unlawful) or because it seems too Western. Just remember that Islam came as a mercy not a burden and you shouldn’t make it into a way of life that is unbearable for the next person. Islam is a moderate way of life. It’s the middle path. It’s not extreme. It’s easy and simple.
So, I will leave you a few lasting words to think about as we travel through this beautiful religion and way of life:
“Thus We have appointed you a middle nation, that ye may be witnesses over mankind, and that the messenger may be a witness over yourselves ..” Quran 2:143
Assalamu alaykom everyone,
It is known in Islamic-history during the time of the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) that he went from Makkah to the mosque in Jerusalem and ascended through the heavens on the buraq. In his ascenscion (Al-Mi’raj), he met the different prophets (peace be upon them all) and from this ascension the daily prayers were established. After detailing this account to the people, nobody believed him except for his bestfriend, Abu Bakr as-Sadiqque (May Allah be pleased with him). Abu Bakr as-Sadiqque told the people to believe in what the messenger had said because he know that the messenger would only speak the truth. In hearing this from Abu Bakr as-Sadiqque, the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was confident and reassured in his mission. However, this was not the first time that the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) received motivation from others. One of the first incidents in Islamic-history in which this happened was at the beginning of his prophet-hood. Upon becoming a prophet, Muhammad (peace be upon him) would feel frightened by the Angel Gabriel and had ran to his wife Khadijah bint Khuwaylid (May Allah be pleased with her) for comfort and support. Khadijah comforted, supported and believed in her husband and the messenger. She told him that Allah wouldn’t do this to him and that he should go forth in what Allah had given him. In hearing this, Muhammad rose from his terrified state and delivered a message that is still being heard today. Furthermore, his motivation continously reaches from the grave because from his example we can learn how to strive despite our own obstacles and problems.
In dealing with our own problems in life, we can find solace in knowing that our own beloved prophet was just like us. He was like you and I. He underwent trials and tribulations. He went through phases in which he needed that gentle hand and that reassuring voice. This example should create warmth in our hearts. It should penetrate beneath the deep depths of our own woes and sorrows. We should build strength from his life. Additionally, this man was not just a man but a prophet. So, in knowing that a prophet can experience these most human-experiences just allows us to see that being a human isn’t without its own struggles and strife. However, we can help one another and be that Khadijah or Abu Bakr. We can be that to our mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, grandparents, spouses, children and etc. Never believe you can’t be that confidant because you can.
As we encounter the world on a daily-basis, I would simply say to be a source of motivation for others. We all need that. The world is a scary, confusing and frightening place to live. In understanding this reality, we have to cling to one another like limbs on a tree. We can only be our own enemies. Our enemies are not the other, but ourselves. We have to conquer our ownselves and strive against our lower-desires. Just love. Take the hand of your neighbor and strive. Rise against oppression. Struggle against injustices. When you find yourself reading the newspaper, a newsletter, an email, or watching the news about war, strife and oppression just remember that you can be that motivation for the wounded, the voiceless, and the oppressed. Wet your tongue with sweet words of motivation and strength.
Remember what Allah says in the interpretation of the meaning:
“And no one will be granted such goodness except those who exercise patience and self-restraint, – none but persons of the greatest good fortune.” (Quran 41:35).
Allah is telling us to remain patient and to remember that goodness will come, inshALLAH. In the prophet-hood of the messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) he had to remain patient and to trust in Allah. He had to struggle and have self-restraint, but he didn’t give up. He found motivation from others and he became a man of great influence upon a whole society and then the whole world, alhumdulilah. Islam has provided great examples for us to look towards in our times of loneliness, doubt, uncertainty, and distress. Never believe that being a human-being means being perfect, but realize that one must remain patient and seek Allah in all his or her affairs.
Our lives will continue to unfold in various directions with various events. So, cling to what is true. Find motivation from others or be a source of motivation. Turn to the Qur’an and turn to the example of the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). See the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) as not only a messenger, but as a human-being that experienced the ups and downs of life just like you and I. He underwent the ups and downs of life and still delivered a mighty message for those that came before and those now. So, remember that we can only be our own enemies. Never give up on yourself and never give up on others.
One of the biggest issues that are occurring throughout many Muslim communities are Muslim-teenagers and young adults getting involved in ‘haraam’ relationships. These relationships develop out of a young man’s or a young woman’s desire in wanting to be with a companion. In being an American Muslim, it is quite troublesome to see the mass amount of sexuality throughout the media and on top of that there are imams, parents, and shuyookh that has disconnected with the realities of many Muslim-youths and adults. The remedy to a young man’s or young woman’s desire in being with a companion is not to tell them that talking to the opposite sex is haraam. No, this is not realistic in the least bit. In most Western societies, men and women communicate on a daily basis for a variety of reasons. Also, we must realize that Islam is a realistic way of life that has given guidance on everything. A Muslim is not in the dark when it comes to most topics because they are guided by the book of Allah and the example of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him), so why are many Muslims indulging in dating?
First, we have to look at the Qur’an and the Sunnah when we are questioning such an issue.
Allah tells us in the Qur’an that he has created a mate for every one of us, thus leading us to acknowledge that the want of being with a companion is a natural feeling:
“And Allah has made for you your mates of your own nature, and made for you, out of them, sons and daughters and grandchildren, and provided for you sustenance of the best.” [Noble Quran 16:72]
However, this want or need is only restricted within the context of marriage to preserve morality within a society. So, how does one move from knowing that marriage is the only lawful option in being with the opposite sex? They proceed in the process of marriage, right? Of course. Furthermore, the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) even encouraged those that can get married to do so to prevent fitna(trouble, corruption) from arising throughout the lands. What are these issues? Fornication and dating. Why is it a problem to date?
Allah says in the interpretation of the meaning:
“And come not near to unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a faahishah (a great sin) and an evil way.” (Sura Al-Israa # 17 ayah # 32)
So, in Islam it is known that steps that leads to fornication should be cut off for one to preserve their religion. So, if we understand this notion that fornication is a major sin and dating is a step towards fornication then why are people still dating when it is wrong? Great question.
The prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said to the ummah (community):
“O you young men! Whoever is able to marry should marry, for that will help him to lower his gaze and guard his modesty.” [Al-Bukhari]
The prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) is telling us the multiple reasons of why a person should get married. One of the many reasons that a person may date is because they are usually desirous of an individual, thus unable to lower their gaze. Also, it helps a person from going forth in engaging in sexual activity that would otherwise be reserved for marriage.
Also, It is narrated by Anas that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said,
“When a man marries, he has fulfilled half of his religion, so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half.”
This hadith is apart of a bigger hadith that is in Sahih-Bukhari. The hadith in Sahih-Bukhari expounds on the meaning of “the other half”. The “other half” means to protect one’s tongue. The prophet Muhammad said: “If you can protect what is between your lips (your tongue) and your legs( your private parts) then you will be given paradise”.
So, once a person fulfills the act of getting married they are keeping themselves from engaging in illegal sexual activity because their mate have become lawful for them in having sexual intercourse. So, once a person protects one of the two things that the prophet Muhamamd told us of then it becomes important to go forth in protecting the tongue from slander, gossip, backbiting an etc.
Additionally, the prophet Muhammad continued to warn his nation about this issue of marriage by stating that:
Al-Tirmidhi #3090, Narrated Abu Hurairah, r.a.
Allah’s Messenger (peace be upon him) said, ‘When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks your daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so, there will be temptation on Earth and extensive corruption.’ [Tirmidhi, Nasa’i and Ibn Majah transmitted it.]
The prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) has not forgotten anything. Islam is so detailed in regards to this issue that the issues we are seeing today are the direct effects of what we aren’t doing throughout our Muslim communities. Islam doesnt deny any person the right to experiencing the natural feeling of wanting to be with another person of the opposite sex. This is not even the issue. However, the issue is when an individual do experience these feelings and feel like going forth in fulfilling their sexuality through unlawful means. It is very easy to tell someone to fear Allah, which is great advice, but if the dialogue about marriage isnt opened up and spoken about then it will remain a taboo among many Muslim families.
This taboo about sexuality and marriage for many families have led many Muslims, especially the young to indulge in unislamic relationships. The only way to mend these problems is to open up the dialogue. Anytime a male or female states they are seeking to get married then this issue is quite serious, especially if they are in their mid-teens, twenties and thirties. The dialogue must be honest, expansive and open. The topic of marriage is serious and important. All of those seeking to get married and those seeking to help in the marriage process should lay out the responsibilities, advantages, Islamic rulings, possible problems that would arise, and etc. The dialogue about marriage isn’t supposed to be sugar-coated or made to seem easy, but to simply inform the uninformed. If there are more open conversations about marriage then there will be less accounts of dating and unislamic relations between men and women.
So, open the conversation up in your local masjid, in your home, at your school and in your social-circles. Listen to those that wanting to fulfill half of their religion and wanting to seek out the lawful option in being with a companion. Make the conversation beneficial, realistic and worthwhile. Atleast the one thing that any person can do is to simply plant the seed of knowledge and allow it to blossom from there. Islam is a simple and beautiful way of life. So, allow Islam to be the guide and put your faith in Allah.
“…(Such is) the artistry of Allah, Who disposes of all things in perfect order…” (al-Naml 27:88).
O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even though it be against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, be he rich or poor, Allah is a Better Protector to both (than you). So follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest you avoid justice; and if you distort your witness or refuse to give it, verily, Allah is Ever Well-Acquainted with what you do. [Surah An-Nisa (4:135)]
As I experience life, I must admit that love is a powerful emotion and state of being. Love penetrates every person in every way of life and culture. The need in wanting to be with someone or to be loved is something familiar all across the board. We all understand that as human-beings that love can be exciting, but also painful.
It stirs something up within us. It makes us reach for peaks and dreams. It drives us to the edge of something or sometimes nothing. It makes us frustrated and sometimes ecstatic. And it makes us hopeful for tomorrow.
I can honestly say that love is something powerful and beautiful. And it would be a fallacy to say that love is anything but beautiful. Once it becomes something other than beautiful then can we truly call it love? Love can’t be placed in a box or classified according to a dictionary, but its abstract. We can’t define what love is or should be. The only thing that we are quite certain of is that its beautiful and it makes us spring from the lowest of places.
And we shouldn’t plant anything but love in this quick and fast-paced world. Allah says in the Qur’an that he made different tribes and nations so that they can know one another, not despise each other. And I believe this is beautiful. Sometimes we forget that we are all here trying to do the same thing. Just survive and make the most out of our lives and our circumstances.
So, the next time you encounter a person try to plant love and not hate.